Wednesday, September 12, 2012

When It Explodes In Your Face

You're never expecting it. You post an innocent picture or rant on facebook, expecting it to get the likes that most of the stuff you normally post receives, when all of a sudden you find people getting angry in your comments. What do you do? How do you fix this?

This happened to me to a mild degree during the whole Chick-Fil-A fiasco - where people were taking sides about supporting homosexuals or freedom of speech because of certain comments that the COO, Dan Cathy, made. Another writer posted an image with directions on how to make a Chick-Fil-A sandwich at home if you no longer wanted to go to the restaurant. I thought it would be a good idea to hit the share button for any of my friends who might have wanted the information. I didn't post my opinion on the issue or even write anything in the comments, but several people posted heatedly, one of which wasn't even on my friends list at all.

I decided to stay silent and felt guilty, since some of the people arguing were authors who had been kind to me in the past. My heart told me to defend them. My mind told me to stay out of it and it would blow over.

Expressing my opinions has been an issue that's been hard for me to deal with as of late. When you speak your mind, there are always people who don't want to hear what you have to say. It didn't help that there was a thread recently on a forum I love to post on about a successful author and how she's kept most of her opinions to herself. She shows kindness to other authors and readers, which is why so many of us love her and read her books.

Me, on the other hand, I had expressed a strong opinion previously in the exact thread this was posted in. I immediately felt like an idiot and toned it done through editing my post. I've been nervous about expressing strong opinions ever since.

My parents and I have discussed the Chick-Fil-A issue in private and just so you know, we were on opposing sides of the argument. I won't say what my opinion was, but I will say we were able to love and respect each other anyway.

I also want to say that regardless of how I feel about Chick-Fil-A, I don't ever want to be viewed in a similar manner as Chick-Fil-A. You may not like the genres or style I write in. If not, that's okay. But I'd hate for you to buy my book just because you liked one of my opinions or refuse to buy it because you disagreed with me. It's about my products, not who I am as a person.

I'd love to have readers of all religious beliefs, political opinions, races, sexualities, and genders. You're all special and will teach me something different through interactions with you.

8 comments:

Joyce Alton said...

Sorry to hear that happened to you. You're right, these days you have to be very careful what you post because people want to take sides or misconstrue what you say. I like the author's stance (the one you mentioned) about keeping personal opinions out of the equation.

Tricia Drammeh said...

It's especially hard right now because there are so many political postings on FB. Sometimes I'll like a post I agree with, but I try not to comment or share because I know I'm not a strong enough person to deal with the backlash. But, what if the issue is something I feel passionately about? Do I keep my opinions to myself so I don't alienate friends or family? Or, do I follow my heart and state my views? I'm glad you blogged about this issue. I think it's something we all struggle with.

Angie Sandro said...

Mama always said, "Don't argue politics or religion." I agree do he most part. Thing is, you have a right to your opinion. You have the right to express it like everyone else. The trick is knowing when to to stay silent.

I missed the debate, and I am glad. There are certain issues I won't stay silent on.

SC Author said...

I do think that it is really important to talk about such issues, but the huge thing s many people screw up is to RESPECT everyone's opinion. No one seems to understand that anymore. How great would it be if we all could just talk peacefully about these things and just discuss? So much anger would be diminished. But that doesn't happen. I do think I partly write t express my opinions which I feel suffocated, almost, because I feel scared to reveal them. But I will not get upset if someone has a different idea than mine. In fact I'd love it.

Thank you so much for this post :) The sad thing is, it's become BAD to express one's opinions... That is scary to me. I'd love to be ale to discuss this all freely :)

Thank you once again!

Anonymous said...

Lots of beneficial in a row. I give rise to bookmarked your place.

T.J. said...

I express mine easily. I also have 2 FB pages. if you are on my personal as a friend...expect the opinions LOL I have had family and friends defriend me, but I am okay with it. Like I posted once, there's the door. I walked away from my mother because of her actions and some of my family took sides. Their options and their right. I can't tell another how to feel, how to form their opinions. But those that know me best know to give the same respect. Even funnier, I have a friend in Tulsa who is the exact opposite of my stances. He is my FAVORITE sparring partner. We used to sit during boring interludes, with pens, paper and calculators, links to information and debate for hours, never changing each other's mind, but definitely respecting the other's opinion. And you can see us sparring every now and again still. You may want to think about that, a closed personal page and an open writer's page. That way you can keep your personal and professional lives separate...and freedom to express what you like without much debate :)

Peacehart said...

If it's the comment I'm thinking about, I don't think you should have edited it! I didn't find it offensive at all and was pleased you mentioned it.

I do believe everyone has a right to free speech, but it's so hard to find the line between free speech and hate speech. Look at what the anti-Islamic movie has done?

Me, personally, I usually am on the side that defends people and does not discriminate.

eva nurlela putri said...

Banned complain !! Complaining only causes life and mind become more severe. Enjoy the rhythm of the problems faced. no problem no life, no matter did not learn, so enjoy it :)

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